Title: Grace Under Pressure Author: Lauralee Date: 1998 Category: Vignette Rating: G Author's Notes: This takes place a short time after my last vignette: A Working Relationship, all of which take place in my At The World's End universe. This is immediately following the scouting mission into the new solar system into which the Fleet is about to enter. The knuckles on Starbuck's right hand were white around his viper control stick. He closed his eyes against the sight in front of him. There was no sign of his wing mate on his scanners. He didn't know what was worse - the empty screen or the conversation that kept replaying in his head. "There's something on this planet Starbuck. There are life form readings and they appear to be human. There looks to be an extensive civilizations on the south-eastern and north-western continents. It's strange though, the signal keeps appearing and disappearing." "It must be some atmospheric interference with our scanners. Let's go take a closer look," Starbuck advised. "Take the approach from the western hemisphere, I'll take the east." "I don't know Starbuck, it seems as if the signals are being deliberately manipulated. Maybe we shouldn't split up. We are dealing with a potentially hostile situation." "There is no indication of hostility here Athena. It's just some distortion. Cylons or weaponry and they probably haven't noticed us yet," Starbuck replied impatiently. "You're not on the bridge Athena, you can't sit back and wait for someone else to do the dirty work." "Starbuck, it's against protocol for a reason to wing mates to split up when advancing on unknown territory," Athena diplomatically ignored her partner's unfair jab at her former assignment. "Trust your instincts Athena. We'll only be separated for a few centons. Use our emergency code if you get into any trouble. "I trust my instincts Starbuck. It's you who doesn't trust my instincts," Athena pointed out calmly. "Athena, as a senior warrior I am ordering you to just get this scouting over with, we'll be back together in a few centons. This isn't some class simulation we don't have time to waste arguing!" "Yes, Sir," Athena answered quietly, obviously hurt by his outburst. Just a few centons later a few beeps came over his com. It was their emergency code indicating that Athena had met with hostile forces and warning him to avoid detection. "Frak!" Starbuck slammed his fist down on his console. For now he swore he would follow the advice she would have given. When his scans showed no sign of her or the parties that had attacked her, and he had no doubt she had disappeared against her will, instead of rushing down to the planet to save her he was heading off to get some back up from the rest of the scouting party - and to warn them. As he headed towards the next planet in the system ships appeared in front of him. Starbuck winced when he realized who he had found - Bojay and Sheba, Athena's boyfriend and good friend. "Starbuck, what are you doing here? Where's Athena?" Bojay's voice rang overloud in Starbuck's guilty ears. "She's...she ran into some trouble. I can't locate her," Starbuck admitted in a rush. We need to round up the others and head back there. She was taken by force." "How do you know there wasn't just some mechanical trouble?" Sheba interjected calmly. 'Sheba!" Starbuck said impatiently. "I know when my wing mate is in trouble and she's in trouble, we don't have time to waste." "All right Starbuck. Please calm down. You're not going to be of any help if you get yourself in a state," Sheba tried to calm her distraught friend. "Do you have her last location?" "I'm going to get Apollo and the others," Bojay interrupted and veered away. Sheba let out a frustrated breath. She didn't need two overwrought pilots while trying to lead a rescue mission. If there was a rescue mission. "I know the general area," Starbuck answered. "Let's send Bojay a message and head back there." He didn't want to wait for Apollo, afraid that the Captain would order them not to mount a rescue, even for his own sister. "I'm not waiting to let your boyfriend tell me not to do this Sheba!" he warned. "Starbuck, we are going to have to investigate what the danger may be here. Please calm down and send me the coordinates. Here comes everyone now." Starbuck removed his hand from his viper stick and clenched it to stop it's shaking. Starbuck was furious with himself. His wing mate and friend was in danger because he was in a foul mood and wanted to play senior officer. "I've sent a priority message back to the Galactica telling them to keep the Fleet out of this area and to send some long range scans of the surrounding planets. Let's approach the coordinates Starbuck has given us from the second moon of the planet. We're going to have to stick together and keep a close eye," Apollo ordered. "I, uh, forgot to mention Apollo. Your sister said she was getting intermittent readings of life forms. She thought the signals were being tampered with. Maybe they were even fake. I thought it might be atmospheric distortions, but obviously something was there." Starbuck mentally berated himself again. "Is that everything Starbuck? Let's get going!" Bojay lashed out. "Let's calm down everyone. Let's concentrate of finding Athena," Boomer interjected before an argument could break out. "Boomer's right," Bojay said with an apology in his voice. "Let's go find Athena and what's going on here, before it threatens all of us and the Fleet." Bojay closed his eyes. the young warrior tried to calm his nerves. The sweat dripping down his forehead wasn't helping him achieve that goal. It was just a physical manifestation of them that wouldn't let him avoid what was happening. Bojay slammed his fist on the console in front of him in a futile attempt to expend his excess energy. Sometimes being in a viper didn't fulfill his innate need to be an active participant in the events around him. Bojay had sudden nostalgia for his jaunt in Gamoray not so long ago. What was usually Bojay's most favored challenge had suddenly turned into his worst nightmare. Space, usually so full of limitless possibilities of discovery had in recent yahrens turned into man's most frightening unknown. Instead of relishing the discovery of new worlds and peoples, warriors worried about all the places the Cylons could hide to launch an attack. Not having seen the Cylons since the destruction of the BaseStar in the last galaxy hadn't abated the paranoia. Never, however, had Bojay himself ever lost his awe and love of space. Bojay thought and felt a searing pain in the region of his chest. Bojay shook his head and turned his concentration to keeping track of his fellow warriors' flight paths and watching for any surprises along the way. They didn't know what had happened to Athena and what they might have to face in order to save her. Bojay wouldn't allow himself to be caught unprepared. They were going to save her, Bojay wouldn't allow himself to doubt that again. Athena. His friend. His partner, not in the cockpit, but over the last sectars in almost every other sense of the word. The woman he wanted already knew he wanted to get sealed to. And they didn't know what had happened to her. She was out there and he had to save her. Logically he knew that he couldn't have done any better than Starbuck, but that didn't stop him from wishing that he had been there nor from feeling that he could have done the magic thing that would have kept her safe. The one thing that would have obviated the need for him to be sitting in this viper wondering if she was still alive instead of having a romantic picnic in the Celestial Dome as they had planned. Bojay corrected his wayward thoughts. "She's going to be all right!" Bojay heard Starbuck's words of reassurance. Bojay wasn't sure who Starbuck was speaking to, Bojay or himself. Bojay tried to think dispassionately, to imagine how he would feel in Starbuck's place. Starbuck had been resentful of Athena being assigned as his wingmate, he had vocally admitted his mistrust of her abilities. Bojay hoped that had prompted Starbuck to me more vigilant in looking out for her as he tended to do with the cadets he trained. "Hey Bo," Sheba's melodious voice came over Bojay's comm. "She's going to be fine. In fact, you're going to fly in there to play hero and she's going to be fine waiting for a ride." Bojay smiled. His wingmate never failed to cut through the jumble of thoughts and help him focus on the task at hand. It wasn't usually what she said, but her presence that made the difference. Bojay knew for sure that Athena was going to be okay. He and Sheba were an unbeatable team. Apollo and Starbuck could eat their space dust! * * * * * * * * * * Apollo wasn't faring as well as Bojay. He was furious. He was furious at himself for assigning his sister to an active team. He was furious at his Father for letting her transfer from her safe post on the Bridge. He was furious at Starbuck for not preventing whatever had happened to his baby sister. Most of all he was furious at her for disappearing on him like every other woman he cared about seemed to do. His mother, his wife and now his sister. None were the first and he was afraid none would be the last. Apollo slowed his viper down as they approached the planet where Starbuck said his sister had disappeared. There were no notable readings on his scanners. That was a bad sign. They weren't picking up any sign of Athena. "I can't find any sign that she was even here," Apollo stated gruffly to his team of friends. "There's nothing on my scans either," Sheba's voice caused Apollo to visibly flinch inside his viper. Apollo realized that his feelings were beginning to distract him from the important mission at hand. "Let's make sure that we stay in pairs at all times. I'm sending our coordinates and our scans back to the Galactica on a scrambled frequency. Hopefully their computers can find something," Apollo turned his concentration back to where it belonged. "We're not going to stop looking, right?" Starbuck interjected. "No, we're going to keep looking, but...," Apollo didn't finish his sentence. They all knew the unspoken caveat. If it began to seem the Fleet was in danger the Fleet was going to be diverted and their search would be cut short. The entire Fleet couldn't be risked for one warrior. Not even the Commander's daughter. There was silence following Apollo's unspoken warning. Everyone concentrating on trying to find something, anything which might reveal where Athena was and if there were any dangers out there. After a few centons Starbuck broke the silence. "We need to split up and take a closer look at that planet. I know where she was when I lost contact with her. It was that planet. There's something not right about it. There's something there. There should be some kind of signal or readings coming out of there, but there isn't anything. She was there!" "Starbuck's right, we need to get down on that planet and take a look," Bojay agreed. "Let's all stay together and approach this carefully," Boomer cautioned as was his usual wont. "Fine, let's approach the area Starbuck mapped out against the planet's orbit. We'll have to maintain comm silence and find somewhere to land. Send coordinates only, not voice communications," Apollo cautioned. He tightened his grip on his control stick. he vowed. * * * * * * * * * * Athena lay motionless on the strange and desolate planet. Her parachute was spread around her body as if an angel had fallen. A short distance away a fire burned what was left of her viper. Despite the disturbance, nothing on the planet moved except a small wind which bent the grasses and ruffled the leaves on the trees. A few centons passed and there was finally movement. Movement and a bright light coming from the nearby woods. From the light source came figures that appeared human. They approached the injured warrior, circling her prone figure and studying. After a few more centons one of them leaned down, removed her cracked oxygen mask and touched the woman, an iridescent glow surrounding the contact. Athena's eyes fluttered open. She blinked a few times trying to focus through the light at the figure who was still touching her. Suddenly the prone woman gasped and shrunk back. "Zac?" ~~~~~~~~~~~ The five vipers stayed in formation as they began orbiting the planet which Boomer had dubbed "Kegel." The pilots were silent as they waited for something to appear on their scanners - be it life signs or a wreckage. Centons passed and the silence got tenser and tenser, no one daring to speak until there was something to say. Suddenly a voice broke the silence. "I've found something," came Starbuck's shaky voice. "Where is it Starbuck?" Apollo asked, trying to calm his friend and get some information. "I don't have anything." "Upper continent, not far from the coast. There's wreckage," Starbuck called out the exact coordinates. "There's no life signs," he said, his voice suddenly hoarse. "There's no life signs according to our scanners on the entire planet, yet it looks perfectly habitable. There are plants but no insects? There must be some sort of magnetic field interfering with our readings, natural or otherwise," Boomer pointed out astutely. "Stay with me Bo," Sheba spoke to her wingmate on a private channel, knowing how the recent announcement must be affecting him. "I'm here Sheba, I'm okay," Bojay answered, his fears apparent in his voice despite his reassuring words. Sheba herself wasn't as confident as she sounded, but she knew that if she let her own fear show, the rest of the team, other than Boomer, would give in to their's. And then nothing would be accomplished. Apollo was likely to try and send her back to the Fleet. Sheba usually shrugged it off when he played macho like that, she accepted that he had some real personal issues in play. If it made him feel better to relinquish responsibility mentally, then she had no problem letting him. She just didn't want to waste the energy now. She had to find Athena. This was her best friend. This was the man she loved's, albeit secretly, sister. Her wingmate and other best friend's girlfriend. Their Commander's daughter. If something happened to Athena many people would be devastated. Morale in the Fleet would be negatively impacted. Sheba knew her role here was to be the steady one. Her and Boomer. But damn, it was hard! "Boomer's right, we need to go down there and do it quick. There doesn't appear to be any of the Cylons you and Athena ran into earlier," Sheba said encouragingly. "There doesn't appear to be _anything_!" Apollo exclaimed. "How do we know that isn't a Cylon field blocking us? They could have her dammit!" "We have to go down there, Cylon trap or not!" Bojay insisted. "I wasn't saying otherwise, that's _my_ sister!" Apollo thundered back at Bojay. "Guys, we have to stay calm. Apollo was merely assessing the situation," Sheba broke in before the men started shooting at each other. "We can't turn against each other. Something is out there and we have to stand together. Athena is out there." "So let's stop talking and go. Adama should know by now that there were cylons in the area and he should have the Fleet at a standstill," Starbuck began to program the coordinates he needed into his viper. As Captain of the Squadron Apollo knew it was his duty to say the next words, but his fist was clenched as he tried to force out the words. 'I can't do this, I can't say this!' he thought in anguish, his anger suddenly washed away by the despair he was trying to hold at bay. He closed his eyes for a micron and took a deep breath before speaking. "We only have three centars. Whether Adama hears from us or not he's going to have to divert the Fleet away from this system. If we don't find anything in the next three centars we have to go back and join them," Apollo said in a voice devoid of emotion as tears ran down his cheeks. 'I can't leave another sibling behind,' he thought brokenly even as the words left his mouth. No one else in the group responded to Apollo's warning. They all knew and they all realized how hard it was for Apollo to say that. For him to contemplate leaving his sister behind whether they knew her fate or not. To leave another sibling behind to die. Sheba visibly winced as she heard the words. No matter how often these rules were drilled into their heads, hearing it and having to follow them when the person who might be left behind was a friend was unbelievable. "Let's head towards the coordinates Starbuck relayed," Boomer broke the strained silence. Without a word everyone began to change course and head towards the now-ominous planet. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Zac?" Athena sat up and called out. After a few microns, her fuzzy vision began to clear and she noticed where she was. She was no longer in laying on the ground, for one thing. Nor was she even outside. Her head began to hurt as she tried to figure out what her last memory was and what was a dream. She remembered ejecting from her viper as it plummeted towards the unidentified planet. The next she remembered she had woken up on the ground and saw...Zac! 'But that can't be real? But how did I get here? Where is here?' she looked around hoping she was just in part of the Galactica Life Center she had never seen, or even another Fleet ship, but this didn't look like anyplace she had ever seen. Anyplace that would even exist in the Fleet. 'This must be a dream!' she sat up and pinched herself. "Ow, well, if this is a dream I've just disproved a long held theory." It was then she noticed what she was wearing, or rather wasn't wearing. Her uniform was gone and in its place was a long white...thing. It wasn't really a dress, but some sort of drapery. And it was completely white. It perfectly matched the "room" she found herself in. Everything in the room was white, even the table she sat on. Except it didn't really seem like a table. It was comfortable even though it didn't appear to have any cushioning. At this point Athena was seriously considering laying back down and going back to "sleep" and maybe "wake up" anywhere else. Even stranded on that strange planet. 'Starbuck will never find me here,' she thought to herself, confident that no matter how much the warrior didn't want her as a wingmate, he wouldn't abandon her. 'Now if I could just figure out where I was,' Athena hopped off the table. It was then she realized that she should have some injuries. She remembered some pain in her left shoulder and arm and left leg when she "woke up" earlier. Studying her arm now, she didn't even see a scratch. She lifted up the strange garment she was wearing and inspected her leg. Again, not even a scratch. She bent it and swung it back and forth. Not even a twinge. 'Now I know I must be dreaming.' Athena moved away from the table and realized through the room's glare that she was up on a dais. Something about the scene niggled her memory, but she couldn't quite figure out what it was. She looked at her feet and noticed she was barefoot. 'Well, that's going to be a problem getting out of here,' she thought as she looked to see if there was anything she could use for covering other than strips of her gown. She didn't see anything. Almost literally, other than the table she was on there wasn't any other furniture in the room. The very large room she could now see. Rather than tearing her garments she decided to wait and see if she would find something in another room, assuming she could get out of there. There didn't appear to be a door. Still uncertain whether she was dreaming or not, Athena decided she had better try and figure out where she was. Worst that could happen is that she would wake up. "Time to get moving girl!" she told herself and began to walk down the stairs from the dais. Before she reached the bottom step a figure "appeared" in front of her. Startled, she began to step back and tripped. Before she fell down to the floor the figure in front of her reached out and clasped her arms and stopped her fall. "Thank you," she said automatically and looked up at who, or what, was still grasping her arms. She let out a sigh of relief when she saw the face. As much as she missed her brother, she didn't think that seeing Zac right now was something she could deal with calmly. Of course that still didn't explain who was holding her. Not that she was sure she wanted or needed an explanation. Whoever he was, he was simply beautiful. The man helped her stand up, neither of them saying a word. Athena didn't think she could. And frankly, whether this vision could speak was the last thing on her mind. She was held in a trance by his gray eyes, blond hair and absolutely stunning facial features. 'He's like an angel,' she sighed to herself. 'Wait! Maybe I'm dead,' Athena felt her heart begin to pound in seeming contradiction to her thoughts. *You are quite alive my dear,* the man said. As she stood in front of the man she realized that he was quite tall, even compared to her. As the spell of the man's looks began to wear thin Athena realized that she hadn't seen his lips move. And she had been watching closely. The words she had heard him "say" had come to her in her mind. "Where am I? Who are you?" Athena demanded, trying to hide her fright and back away from the man at the same time. 'Damn, they took my weapon!' *You don't need weapons here, you are safe. We will no harm you. You are here to make a choice.* "A choice? What are you talking about. Who are you and where am I?" Athena asked more stridently this time, frightened even more by this second demonstration of telepathy. *Please, do not be frightened. We mean you no harm. I am here to help you.* Athena stopped and straightened her posture, wiping all expression from her face. "Help me do what? All I want are my shoes, my weapon and to get back to my ship." She wasn't sure right then if she meant the Galactica or her destroyed viper, and frankly she didn't care which he took it as. *You must first be presented with your other choices.* "That is what I want, there are no other choices." *Yes there are,* a new and familiar voice said in her head. Athena spun around, trying to find the source of this new voice. She was not surprised this time to see "Zac" standing behind her. She took a hesitant step forward. The man who touched her before had had substance. Perhaps she could touch this "Zac" and hold him as she had longed to for so long, even if it was only a dream. Before she took her second step she remembered the man behind her. 'I turned my back! Frak!' she began to berate herself before she realized that at two to one she didn't have much choice. *Still a warrior dear sister,* the voice of Zac chuckled in her head. *But this is no dream. I am here.* "If you're Zac then please use your voice to speak to me, this telepathic stuff is freaking me out," Athena said in a calm voice as she approached him. She studied his face and body. It looked like Zac and even under his gown he appeared to have the same body, the same stance that she remembered of her older brother. "Is this better Tena?" the one who looked like Zac said in the regular way - out loud. "Where are we?" *Within a dimension quite apart from your own.* "Oh, that explains it," Athena nodded enthusiastically. After a few microns she stopped nodding and tilted her head. "Okay, now for the real answer please? And who are you? You look like my brother, but you couldn't possibly be." Athena turned suddenly to check where her former "friend" had gone. He wasn't there. She scanned the rest of the room and didn't see anyone but "Zac." "So am I dead and *you're* an angel?" she asked. "There is some truth to that" "You're as annoying as my little brother as well. Some truth to what? What _is_ the truth? What is going on here?" Athena demanded, truly exasperated. "Zac" smirked. "Before you can have answers you must make choices." "So I've been told. What I haven't been told is what the choices are!" "Go with it Athena, it will all become clear soon enough," Zac advised. Suddenly the room was lit with a blinding light. Next thing Athena knew she was standing back on the Galactica in the men's bunks. 'This might not turn out so bad,' she thought irreverently as she looked towards where she knew the showers to be. She figured since she couldn't figure out what was going on yet, or a way out, she might as well enjoy herself. "Pay attention," Zac told her. "I thought I was," she mumbled under her breathe, earning a glare from her companion, brother, whatever. Just then two men came walking into the room, Starbuck and Zac. "Now I really don't understand what's going on!" Athena exclaimed. "Starbuck!" she yelled and ran over to him. He walked on as if he hadn't seen or heard a thing. Which in fact he hadn't. "He can't hear or see you," Zac pointed out. "Nothing new there," Athena mumbled, again. Zac just rolled his eyes. Athena settled herself down, waiting for some clue as to what she was supposed to do. "That was a great practice Zac," Starbuck was saying to the other Zac. "Thanks Starbuck, I really appreciate you helping me practice. Apollo's just got to let me take a patrol soon with those scores," Zac was saying excitedly. Starbuck laughed and put his fumarillo back in his mouth. "Sure kid," he said around the accessory. "I promised to talk to him for you, relax." "I know, I know," Zac said with a sigh. "Can I ask you something Starbuck?" Zac said in a more subdued tone. "Sure, go ahead," Starbuck started to pull his warrior jacket off. Athena sighed unconsciously at the sight, and the hopes that she might just get to see something more interesting on this "trip." "What are you doing with Athena?" Zac asked in a calm tone. Athena straightened from her pose and looked at the "Zac" she had arrived with. 'What is going on here?' she wondered. She had already figured out that this was probably a scene from the past, whether it was real or not. "It's real, this happened," her companion assured her. "Stop reading my mind," she snapped. This time her "Zac" laughed. She turned her attention back to the scene in front of her. Starbuck hadn't answered Zac yet. He was facing away from the young warrior and a strange look passed over his face. He put his fumarillo down in a receptacle and turned back to his inquisitor. "What do you mean?" he finally asked. "She's my sister," Zac explained unnecessarily. "You have Aurora at home and tons of women around her who are dying to date you, so why Athena?" "What the hades kind of question is that?" Athena demanded, hurt by her brother's question. "Settle down and listen," her tour guide told her. She crossed her arms and glared at the men doing the talking. "She's a beautiful, talented, loyal, intelligent, vibrant woman. Why not Athena? She's your sister, you're not supposed to see that I guess," Starbuck quipped, obviously trying to squirm his way out of the discussion. "Spare me Starbuck. You know what I'm talking about. I know what an incredible person she is. What I want to know is why you with her? Apollo is your best friend, hurting his sister isn't the nicest thing to do," Zac stated, still calm. Understanding flashed in Starbuck's eyes. "You assume I'm playing around with her." "Aren't you? What about Aurora? What about your other women? What about commitment? My sister deserves it." Starbuck looked down at the ground obviously giving respectful attention to the young man's words. "Aurora and I, we're not working out. I mean, I care for her a great deal, but I don't love her. She doesn't love me. We never see each other. She's back on Caprica. As soon as we get home for the peace celebration I plan to break it off with her officially. We've always both seen other people," he explained quietly. "And until then you're going to, to, hang out with Athena?" Zac demanded, clearly unconvinced. "I'm not hanging around Zac. I'm not playing with her affections or feelings. You're right, she's my best friend's sister and there are plenty of women out there I could have a good time with. I wouldn't do that to Apollo, or you. I wouldn't do that to her. Have you ever thought that maybe she's the one who doesn't want to commit?" Starbuck asked in a strained voice. Zac was clearly surprised by the Lieutenant's words. It had clearly never occurred to him that it was Athena who was refusing a commitment. "I care about your sister a great deal Zac. I may even, uh, love her," Starbuck revealed uncomfortably. "There's no one else I can talk to like I talk to her. No one else who understands and accepts me as I am. But it doesn't matter right now because _she's_ not ready to settle down right now. She's young, she's entitled to investigate her other options. I hope it's me she chooses in the end, but right now she can't do that and I won't make her choose." Zac sat down on his bunk trying to take it all in. Athena, his baby sister, didn't want to settle down? His sister was the one refusing a commitment with Starbuck? He knew that his sister loved him in return, or was at least infatuated with him. She never hesitated with Orion, his jumbled thoughts were clear on his face. He just didn't get it. "She never hesitated with Orion," Zac mumbled loud enough for Starbuck to hear. "No she didn't," Starbuck said shortly and turned away. "I'm sorry Starbuck, I didn't mean to say that out loud," Zac apologized. Starbuck shrugged and continued to change out of his clothes and prepare for a shower. Athena and "Zac," however, could see his face. And the tear running down his cheek. Athena stood with her mouth open in shock. Never in a million yahren had she any idea that Starbuck had felt that strongly about her. His behavior after the Destruction, after her rejection of what she had thought was a meaningless proposal in that locker room, made sense. He had been hurt, but he had trouble letting her go. She had thought he had proposed out of fear and had chosen her as second best after believing Aurora dead. That he had been just playing around with her until moving on to the next woman. She had been so wrong, foolishly and immaturely wrong. If only he had been open with her. Zac's action also had her surprised. They had always been close, but she never thought he would dream of questioning his idol over his apparent callousness towards her. She wanted to cry, touched by the depth of caring her brother had displayed. But it was kind of hard with two of them standing right there. "You never know what's in people's hearts and mind do you?" she asked her guide brokenly. "Zac" looked at her compassionately and nodded. Before Athena could say anything further another blinding light overwhelmed them. The End